My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
