i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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