god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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