K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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