Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
