So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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