I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
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