We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
