My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize