How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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