Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I seem to have left my pride at pride
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
