I need help removing her.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
