Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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