did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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