i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
