If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
