I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
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My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
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He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
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