You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
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