is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
people are starting to question the shark bite story
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Randomize