farters have to be the big spoon...
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I have a pirate flag
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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