she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it penis luge time yet?
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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