I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
