Dual....:-)
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
