You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize