ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
