he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
