butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize