Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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