I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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