Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
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