i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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