dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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