Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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