She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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