I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Quick, to the slutcave!
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
