dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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