Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
