I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
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