She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
