hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
