Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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