Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
