Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
