She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize