i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
