I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize