i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
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I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
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Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
do nipples grow back?
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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