Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
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