he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I understand Curling. That high.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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