I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
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